As we get older, life has a way of changing us. Most of us, if we admit it, struggle with change. But the word of God says, change is inevitable…
When our mom first started showing signs of dementia, we gathered to get recipes we loved so we could help her cook for Thanksgiving. When the disease progressed, we took over the cooking and except for the sweet potato pie (Our Auntie’s Specialty), got good at it. When momsy fell two-years ago for the first time ever… we relied on friends to cook for us and last year…? Well, we concluded that this “tradition” had to be modified.
My dad’s hip injury has left another modification to our traditions. During the holidays he was always out and about running errands for others, picking up and dropping off food, money, whatever was needed… all the while taking care of momsy… but his fall was traumatizing. He had to relinquish much of what he did at home to his kids and even had to come to grips with the fact that he could no longer be “that guy” that would do anything for you. And because we have become caregivers to both our parents… we’ve had to break it to those who depended on his kindness that we cannot or will not do the same thing.
Fearing the whole, running around, doing the cooking and entertaining guests for Thanksgiving thing, I made an executive decision to have our Thanksgiving catered. When I told immediate family, everyone seemed to breathe a great big sigh of relief. We’re on the same page with this and when we need to modify again… we will do so.
Don’t be afraid to rewrite the rules. Don’t be afraid to modify the traditions. We’re about to slam on some good food this Thursday and create new Thanksgiving memories all the while smiling about the days that were.
Like the time we did this… as a family…